Monday, July 23, 2007
Twilight Zone
I am now divorced. Hard to believe and yet...it is true. I sat there in a courtroom with the man I thought I would spend the rest of my life with waiting for the judge for over an hour. We got to talk about everything and I still cannot help but feel like Bryan has never truly let himself feel the implications of his actions. Never really allowed himself to hit "rock bottom". He seems to be justifying everything he has done by saying "I realized I could never adore you the way you deserve to be, so I let you go." What a nice guy! Isn't he??? Ha! IDIOT! What a damn cop out to not be willing to do the work and somehow be able to turn that around to doing the "right thing". He is not the kind of man I want to be with. I long to be with a person who works as hard as I do to have good relationships and realizes that the REAL stuff happens during hard times. The stuff worth living for. I guess if that is who he is, I am probably truly better off???
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2 comments:
Shelby
As hard as it may be to believe, I think you are right that you are probably better off without Bryan in your life. You deserve to be treated with kindness, respect & loyalty & it is just a shame that he was not able to be the person that he "pretended" to be for so long. And what a wimp! He really is never going to be able to admit his mistakes or take responsibility for his actions. I know you & the rest of the gals can agree with me when I say that he has some pretty significant mental health issues. And how sad that he had to destroy a marriage & family life. The anger I feel towards him for hurting you so much is overwhelming, but I know that that is not going to get us anywhere. I am sure you are having lots of mixed emotions right now, but hang in there sister. I can only imagine what it must be like to be sitting in a courtroom across from this "stranger" who you thought was going to be there with you until the end. Know that we all support you & love the person you are. You deserve the best and nothing less!
Probably truly better off? Definitely truly better off! Bryan doesn't deserve your heart, it is too precious to waste on someone willing to hurt it without even thinking twice. You are such an amazing person, and deserve to be with someone as kind and loving as you are. Hang in there, last year at this time your life was in such a different place this year is bound to bring happiness!
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